One of the many joys of sitting quietly in my apartment is when my upstairs neighbor comes home and I get to listen to her (usually several minutes long) greetings and subsequent conversation with her Yorkie; Mr. Biggs. It makes me want to know her. Nothing else about this person has ever been appealing to me, but hearing her little dogs excitedly clicking nails on the wood floor and her high-pitched, squealing hellos as she walks in the door... I'd actually like to hug her.
Today she told him she had missed him and then went on to describe how cold it was outside as she put his leash on. Then I heard them come down the stairs, go outside, her tell him good boy, her mail box opening, and her describing to Mr. Biggs what she found inside.
Maybe she can feel the mental hug I'm sending through my ceiling up into her floor.
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Wherever You Go, There you Are
In Jon Kabat-Zinn’s work, Wherever You Go There You Are; Mindfulness Meditation In Everyday Life, he explains in his introduction that much of what is in the book may seem repetitious but for the reader to understand that this is not the case and that each section varies slightly from the next. When reading the book I found that there were many phrases which were repeated several times such as, “present moment”, “awareness”, and “non-doing” (among others) so I can see how this may lead some readers to feel that sections of the book are paraphrases of other sections-- however my experience did not give me that impression. For me, each chapter had a particular bit of insight, advice, or observation that was helpful in and of itself. Everything is related of course, but there are so many ways to look at any thought or idea that it is necessary (especially when writing about mindfulness) to examine and address as many angles as possible. In short, I felt that the book was mostly helpful and below will elaborate on specific sections which assisted me and sections which did not.
To begin with the Introduction; generally when reading books I have the bad habit of not reading the Preface or Introduction but did so with this book. I thought the way in which he explained that most people are lost in themselves and are alive but not really living was a great way to ease someone into reading about mindfulness and meditation as most people can relate to that feeling. I am/was one of those people, and reading this Introduction made me want to continue reading the book and opened my mind to what he had to say. Most particularly, the third paragraph on page xiii where he discusses losing touch with ourselves and living in a type of cloud that zaps our creativity and if we aren’t careful could live inside of our entire lives. That is something I really identify with and something that worries me about my own life. Because it seems that working as hard as one has to in school and at jobs leaves one no time to just be. Upon finishing Wherever You Go There You Are however, I realize that making that time is one of the most important things a person can do for themselves.
The very first area which I marked for myself to come back to later was on page 39,”The only way you can do anything of value is to have the effort come out of non-doing and to let go of caring whether it will be of use or not.” A tough concept for me because I have a very particular way of thinking. I like to get things done as quickly and as efficiently as possible which means lots of multitasking, list making, and planning. These have always served me well in getting done what I need to get done on a regular basis, so this particular line has been troublesome to me. The first time I read it I immediately began thinking back to see if there were times in my life where I implemented the above and where it may have worked for me. I came up with the art and writing I used to do quite regularly, and realized that when I was drawing, painting, or writing, it was in a totally different spirit than anything else I do/did. While I did those things I was also in a state of non-doing at the same time. The outcome did not matter, I was in no hurry, nor was I attempting masterpieces. Coincidentally, the things I worked on when I was able to attain that state of mind are some of the best things I’ve done. When I read the above line some days later, it became even clearer what the meaning really was-- and a few days later reading it again, even more clarity arose. It’s definitely something I need to work on, but also something I most likely would not have realized I needed to work on without reading this book.
The next section that really affected me was on page 48 and 49 where he speaks about, being in a hurry, impatience, and about how society can control a person’s mind. I used this section in one of the week’s Informal Writes, so I won’t elaborate too much more, but it seems so intuitive for him to state that just below the surface of impatience is anger (48). This is certainly true in many of the people I encounter daily as well as within myself, and having it out there in black and white makes me think about it more than I would have otherwise. I ponder what the reason is for my impatience, and digging deeper, what is the reason for my anger. Asking myself these questions is helpful to let go of those things (since so many of them are unimportant or out of my control) and just let myself be.
The fourth and final section which helped me in my meditation; (most specifically to find time to actually do it) was on page 162 where Kabat-Zinn talks about, in the first paragraph, everyone’s consciousness being connected and that living in love and kindness within yourself not only helps you but helps the rest of the world. This is something that is easy to forget. It was very helpful to me to read it and to remember how important letting go of anger and living in love and kindness really is. Not only does doing this make you feel better about yourself and who you are, but also helps you to accept others for who they are-- letting yourself be and letting others be.
I had a hard time finding anything within his writings that I didn’t find helpful. Only one section sent up a little red flag for me, but I believe it’s only because I am so dreadfully busy all the time. On page 11 where he discusses stopping and states that stopping makes things become simpler. That was a little difficult for me to digest as when I “stop”, things seem to get more overwhelming because that’s when I start going over everything that needs to be done. I do understand what he means here, but the way he phrased it made me think,”Wait a minute...”
As far as my personal meditation goes, I feel that Wherever You Go There You Are has really helped to get my brain back to where it needs to be. The subjects he discusses and the manner in which he phrases them gave me many of the tools I needed to get myself back on track, or off track (depending on how you look at things). I have a hard time though with meditating with groups of people as I am usually physically uncomfortable in some way and I feel too nervous to move around while the room is so quiet. When I’m nervous to move, the more I think about needing to move and the more problem I have letting go of thoughts. Addressing my personal time meditation-- I need to convince myself that it is a priority and stop putting it off to get other school work done. It’s a tough thing for me, because while I agree with and long to work toward everything Kabat-Zinn writes about, when I’m not surrounded by that mindset I convince myself other things are more important, that I don’t have time, and that I’ll do it later.
Written for a meditation "class" I took in 2011. I was searching my documents for a Kabat-Zinn quote I remembered, ended up reading this, liked it, and decided to add it.
To begin with the Introduction; generally when reading books I have the bad habit of not reading the Preface or Introduction but did so with this book. I thought the way in which he explained that most people are lost in themselves and are alive but not really living was a great way to ease someone into reading about mindfulness and meditation as most people can relate to that feeling. I am/was one of those people, and reading this Introduction made me want to continue reading the book and opened my mind to what he had to say. Most particularly, the third paragraph on page xiii where he discusses losing touch with ourselves and living in a type of cloud that zaps our creativity and if we aren’t careful could live inside of our entire lives. That is something I really identify with and something that worries me about my own life. Because it seems that working as hard as one has to in school and at jobs leaves one no time to just be. Upon finishing Wherever You Go There You Are however, I realize that making that time is one of the most important things a person can do for themselves.
The very first area which I marked for myself to come back to later was on page 39,”The only way you can do anything of value is to have the effort come out of non-doing and to let go of caring whether it will be of use or not.” A tough concept for me because I have a very particular way of thinking. I like to get things done as quickly and as efficiently as possible which means lots of multitasking, list making, and planning. These have always served me well in getting done what I need to get done on a regular basis, so this particular line has been troublesome to me. The first time I read it I immediately began thinking back to see if there were times in my life where I implemented the above and where it may have worked for me. I came up with the art and writing I used to do quite regularly, and realized that when I was drawing, painting, or writing, it was in a totally different spirit than anything else I do/did. While I did those things I was also in a state of non-doing at the same time. The outcome did not matter, I was in no hurry, nor was I attempting masterpieces. Coincidentally, the things I worked on when I was able to attain that state of mind are some of the best things I’ve done. When I read the above line some days later, it became even clearer what the meaning really was-- and a few days later reading it again, even more clarity arose. It’s definitely something I need to work on, but also something I most likely would not have realized I needed to work on without reading this book.
The next section that really affected me was on page 48 and 49 where he speaks about, being in a hurry, impatience, and about how society can control a person’s mind. I used this section in one of the week’s Informal Writes, so I won’t elaborate too much more, but it seems so intuitive for him to state that just below the surface of impatience is anger (48). This is certainly true in many of the people I encounter daily as well as within myself, and having it out there in black and white makes me think about it more than I would have otherwise. I ponder what the reason is for my impatience, and digging deeper, what is the reason for my anger. Asking myself these questions is helpful to let go of those things (since so many of them are unimportant or out of my control) and just let myself be.
The fourth and final section which helped me in my meditation; (most specifically to find time to actually do it) was on page 162 where Kabat-Zinn talks about, in the first paragraph, everyone’s consciousness being connected and that living in love and kindness within yourself not only helps you but helps the rest of the world. This is something that is easy to forget. It was very helpful to me to read it and to remember how important letting go of anger and living in love and kindness really is. Not only does doing this make you feel better about yourself and who you are, but also helps you to accept others for who they are-- letting yourself be and letting others be.
I had a hard time finding anything within his writings that I didn’t find helpful. Only one section sent up a little red flag for me, but I believe it’s only because I am so dreadfully busy all the time. On page 11 where he discusses stopping and states that stopping makes things become simpler. That was a little difficult for me to digest as when I “stop”, things seem to get more overwhelming because that’s when I start going over everything that needs to be done. I do understand what he means here, but the way he phrased it made me think,”Wait a minute...”
As far as my personal meditation goes, I feel that Wherever You Go There You Are has really helped to get my brain back to where it needs to be. The subjects he discusses and the manner in which he phrases them gave me many of the tools I needed to get myself back on track, or off track (depending on how you look at things). I have a hard time though with meditating with groups of people as I am usually physically uncomfortable in some way and I feel too nervous to move around while the room is so quiet. When I’m nervous to move, the more I think about needing to move and the more problem I have letting go of thoughts. Addressing my personal time meditation-- I need to convince myself that it is a priority and stop putting it off to get other school work done. It’s a tough thing for me, because while I agree with and long to work toward everything Kabat-Zinn writes about, when I’m not surrounded by that mindset I convince myself other things are more important, that I don’t have time, and that I’ll do it later.
Written for a meditation "class" I took in 2011. I was searching my documents for a Kabat-Zinn quote I remembered, ended up reading this, liked it, and decided to add it.
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