Emma Thompson and and Meryl Streep are amazing.
At the beginning Meryl Streep plays this billion year old Rabi, and later on Emma Thompson plays a completely insane homeless person. There are millions of actors, so many I have no respect for. But these people are incredible. I hate claiming that I know a complete stranger through their acting, 'cause that is pretty silly, but they aren't just actors it seems to me. More like artists. What I trite observation.
Al Pacino is incredible in it too...and Mary-Louise Parker.
I wonder how many thousands, maybe millions, of people have had remarkable interactions with supernatural beings, lights, premonitions, etc. but have disregarded them as hallucinations, nonsense, insanity. Maybe they aren't, maybe people are ignoring these things when they might be the secrets to real life.
And now I am going to type out the lines I was in awe of, because there are so many. I need to find a copy of the screenplay.
The bold ones are the ones I like best.
"In the new century, I think we will all be insane."
"Love is never ambivalent."
"Do you wanna be nice or you wanna be affective?! You wanna make the law or subject to it?!"
"I don't understand why I'm not dead. When your heart breaks you should die. But there's still the rest of you. There's your breasts and your genitals and they're amazingly stupid; like babies or faithful dogs. They just want him...want him."
"...it's all gone too far, too much loss is what they think. We should stop, somehow, go back." "That's not how the world works...it only spins forward." "Yeah, but forward into what?"
"There is no Zion save where you are. If you can not find your heart's desire in your own back yard, you never lost it to begin with."
"You are a battered heart, bleeding life in the universe of wounds."
"You make no sense. The Republican party, the Republican party...I mean I hate the Democrats too, but the Republicans; half religious zealots wanting to control every breath every citizen takes, and half ego, anarchist, libertarian, cowboys shrilling for no government."
"Can't you be ugh, I don't know, happy?" "No one is happy." "You believe the world is perfectible. Yes you do, and so you find it unsatisfying. You have to reconcile yourself to the world's...unperfectability. Be in the world, but not of the world. That's what being a Mormon is." "No, that's what being a schizophrenic is." "Republican, Democrat, it's life. Time is conservative, it moves slow, accept that, don't be tragic. Accept as rightfully yours the happiness that comes your way."
"At first it can be very hard to accept how disappointing life is, but that's what it is, and you have to accept it. With faith and time and hard work you do get to a point where the disappointment doesn't hurt so much and gets...actually easier to live with. Quite easy. Which is in it's own way a disappointment. But..."
"Anything can happen...any awful thing."
"My generation we got clarity, unafraid to look deep into the miasma at the heart of the world. What a pit. What a nightmare is there. I have looked, all my life I have searched for absolute bottom. And I found it believe me. Stygian. How tragic, how brutal and short life is, how sinful people are. The immutable heart of what we are that bleeds through whatever we might become. All else is vanity."
"You're crying. You endanger nothing in yourself. It's like the idea of crying when you do it. Or the idea of love."
"I hate America...I hate this country. Nothing but a bunch of big ideas, and stories, and people dying... The white cracker who wrote the national anthem knew what he was doing he set the word free to a note so high nobody could reach it. That was deliberate. Nothing on earth sounds less like freedom to me."
"I live in America, I don't have to love it. You do that, everybody's gotta love something."
"Failing in love isn't the same as not loving. It doesn't let you off the hook, it doesn't mean you're free to not love."
"Nothing's lost forever. In this world there's a kind of...painful progress. Longing for what we've left behind and dreaming ahead."
Everything is so fucking interesting to me! I watch this thing, and I have a seemingly insatiable lust for philosophy. But then there's the history involved, and I want to read about that. Oh, and everything else there is to read about and ponder and pontifate upon! Harumph! I'd just like to read all day for my career, and write a little, then talk with a few very smart people about what I've read. I request for that to be my job. Where do I apply? I have prepared a resume for the Good Fucking Luck company and have filled out the redundant application, I just need to know where to drop it off.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
What I've Learned
1/2014-- The below was written in 2007, I think it was. I've added some things on the bottom:
I just want to take a minute to say that there is no reason other than a tax brake* to get married.
-If your "significant other" is jealous of your friends, gets angry, or tries to prevent you from hanging out with them, drop them as they are most likely going to make your life MUCH** harder than it already is.
-Being in an "intimate" relationship is very similar to banging your head against a wall over and over again.
-Having a "significant other" is basically saying you have someone in your life who on a regular basis significantly makes you want to be with others.
-The phrase 'I love you' has been used by men to get women to stop talking since the beginning of time. ***
-'I'll call you' means they may or may not call, and if they do it will be when you're busy, sleeping, or should be sleeping. It also means they don't want you calling them and interrupting whatever they may be doing. ∑
-Never sacrifice more than you can recover from in a relationship, because you are not guaranteed your "significant other" will return the favor when you need it.
-If you feel you're not meant to be together at any time; you aren't. ®
-Never ignore your instincts about a person, especially if you're a woman, because in your case you're always right. If you're a man, you're probably right as well but your guts are very close to your penises and the message can sometimes be misconstrued. †
-When you think a man¥ is not listening to you, heˆ isn't. Regardless of what is said.
-If for some reason your "significant other" is making excuses about having sex or meeting your family, you can be almost guaranteed he/she is not digging you as much as they say they are or you think they are.
-If you feel the need to read their sent text messages, you are not with the right person.
-When having an argument, never accept,"I don't know" or "I don't want to talk about this right now." more than twice. It will become its own monster and they will never know and they will never want to talk about it.
-Pertaining to a phone argument, if the other person stays within earshot of mutual friends for the duration, they have little to no respect for you and that should be addressed.
-If you have thought about giving their ego its own name, you should probably start thinking about finding your own place. ø
-Never move in with someone you're dating (unless it's been for several years). Never.
-Procrastination turns into living in filth. π
-When a breakup occurs, give yourself at least a day to wallow, then say fuck it and get off your ass. It won't get any better if you sit on your computer making lists of things you've learned about relationships in the past four years. å
-Last but not least: NEVER assume someone feels about you the way you feel about them. Even if they tell you they love you. Most people have NO idea what that means. ∂
*break
I just want to take a minute to say that there is no reason other than a tax brake* to get married.
-If your "significant other" is jealous of your friends, gets angry, or tries to prevent you from hanging out with them, drop them as they are most likely going to make your life MUCH** harder than it already is.
-Being in an "intimate" relationship is very similar to banging your head against a wall over and over again.
-Having a "significant other" is basically saying you have someone in your life who on a regular basis significantly makes you want to be with others.
-The phrase 'I love you' has been used by men to get women to stop talking since the beginning of time. ***
-'I'll call you' means they may or may not call, and if they do it will be when you're busy, sleeping, or should be sleeping. It also means they don't want you calling them and interrupting whatever they may be doing. ∑
-Never sacrifice more than you can recover from in a relationship, because you are not guaranteed your "significant other" will return the favor when you need it.
-If you feel you're not meant to be together at any time; you aren't. ®
-Never ignore your instincts about a person, especially if you're a woman, because in your case you're always right. If you're a man, you're probably right as well but your guts are very close to your penises and the message can sometimes be misconstrued. †
-When you think a man¥ is not listening to you, heˆ isn't. Regardless of what is said.
-If for some reason your "significant other" is making excuses about having sex or meeting your family, you can be almost guaranteed he/she is not digging you as much as they say they are or you think they are.
-If you feel the need to read their sent text messages, you are not with the right person.
-When having an argument, never accept,"I don't know" or "I don't want to talk about this right now." more than twice. It will become its own monster and they will never know and they will never want to talk about it.
-Pertaining to a phone argument, if the other person stays within earshot of mutual friends for the duration, they have little to no respect for you and that should be addressed.
-If you have thought about giving their ego its own name, you should probably start thinking about finding your own place. ø
-Never move in with someone you're dating (unless it's been for several years). Never.
-Procrastination turns into living in filth. π
-When a breakup occurs, give yourself at least a day to wallow, then say fuck it and get off your ass. It won't get any better if you sit on your computer making lists of things you've learned about relationships in the past four years. å
-Last but not least: NEVER assume someone feels about you the way you feel about them. Even if they tell you they love you. Most people have NO idea what that means. ∂
*break
Monday, August 23, 2010
Soul Mates
When I was a little kid (and throughout my entire life), my father would expound frequently on the topic of soul mates. He is a very sensitive individual whose idea of how others should act is rarely applied to himself. Not because he's as asshole, he's actually a fairly intuitive, intelligent, and compassionate man. But because he doesn't see that his passionate outbursts are confusing, shocking, and sometimes hurtful. He has a deep seeded need for another human being to understand his outrage with the world and his inability to function within it. Unfortunately, when he meets someone new who is kind and patient with him, he becomes attached immediately and because he wants so much to be accepted for who he is by another human being he goes overboard with sentiment and speculation. He assumes, from their attentiveness that they understand his partial sentences and his too long drawn out pauses before answering questions. He believes, because they may agree on some point and may have a good time together, that he can place his soul out on the table and trust that they will do the same for him. Again, unfortunately, most people are frightened by this boldness; this genuine affection, and they retract their friendship just as he believes he has found his soul mate.
So many times did I listen to him talk to my mother about people he had met whom he felt this connection to, that at a very young age I had a good concept of what it meant. When I heard him describe how he felt- heartbroken, I immediately sympathized since I was the class freak with my homemade clothes, environmentalist attitude, overactive emotions, and way above average intelligence. I didn't make real friends until I deserted being smart and began high school...even then whether or not they were real is questionable.
So now, I have friends yes, but I don't believe I have come across a soul mate. I've definitely forced some relationships with others into that category, but I've realized they never really were.
When I hear people talk about someone being their soul mate (as a new friend and an old friend have been recently) I wonder when I'll find one...and where. There's a profound sense of melancholy I feel when I hear the words, and in every new person I meet I find myself searching their faces and mannerisms- could they be who I've been waiting for? Because there are people who have multiple soul mates right? Can't this person just be one of mine? In actuality though, probably not, considering I am not most other people. It sounds egotistical maybe, and self-absorbed surely, but I am very different from the vast majority of other human beings I've observed. I don't fit into certain cliques because I am multifaceted and not satisfied being only a geek, only a queer, only an intellectual, only a feminist, only an activist, only an audiophile, only a writer. I feel that I give each of these parts of myself equal sway in my day to day actions and thoughts. So being included in a groups of people who identify themselves as only one of these things is nice for awhile, but I become frustrated and feel alienated in the eleventh hour. How does one who can relate to all find someone to relate to her?
I long for a genuine bond. I yearn for that other part of me to release itself. I have so much to give but can only seem to find the people who need to take what I don't have.
So many times did I listen to him talk to my mother about people he had met whom he felt this connection to, that at a very young age I had a good concept of what it meant. When I heard him describe how he felt- heartbroken, I immediately sympathized since I was the class freak with my homemade clothes, environmentalist attitude, overactive emotions, and way above average intelligence. I didn't make real friends until I deserted being smart and began high school...even then whether or not they were real is questionable.
So now, I have friends yes, but I don't believe I have come across a soul mate. I've definitely forced some relationships with others into that category, but I've realized they never really were.
When I hear people talk about someone being their soul mate (as a new friend and an old friend have been recently) I wonder when I'll find one...and where. There's a profound sense of melancholy I feel when I hear the words, and in every new person I meet I find myself searching their faces and mannerisms- could they be who I've been waiting for? Because there are people who have multiple soul mates right? Can't this person just be one of mine? In actuality though, probably not, considering I am not most other people. It sounds egotistical maybe, and self-absorbed surely, but I am very different from the vast majority of other human beings I've observed. I don't fit into certain cliques because I am multifaceted and not satisfied being only a geek, only a queer, only an intellectual, only a feminist, only an activist, only an audiophile, only a writer. I feel that I give each of these parts of myself equal sway in my day to day actions and thoughts. So being included in a groups of people who identify themselves as only one of these things is nice for awhile, but I become frustrated and feel alienated in the eleventh hour. How does one who can relate to all find someone to relate to her?
I long for a genuine bond. I yearn for that other part of me to release itself. I have so much to give but can only seem to find the people who need to take what I don't have.
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